Zogstigceb is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, awe-inspiring alligator.

Zogstigceb created Mount Everest three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zogstigceb, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Zogstigceb, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Zogstigceb's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Zogstigceb's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no great tits in a building before entering it.

2. Zogstigceb loves foxes, so they must be honoured.

3. Never write about nebulae.

4. Do not dye your hair mauve.

5. Never eat green fruit.