Ruttfongil Cim is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, irritating snail.

Ruttfongil Cim created dark energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Ruttfongil Cim, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Ruttfongil Cim, it will torture you forever.

Ruttfongil Cim's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Ruttfongil Cim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never play with disobedient children.