Kancedtig is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, selfish mole.

Kancedtig created a bottom quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kancedtig, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Kancedtig, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Kancedtig's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Kancedtig's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ducks.

2. You must pray to Kancedtig eight times a day.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Kancedtig.

5. Never wear ear rings.