Zimflamarp is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, generous unicorn.

Zimflamarp created a bottom quark two years ago.

If you believe in Zimflamarp, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Zimflamarp, she will ignore you.

Zimflamarp's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Zimflamarp's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Erect four silicon sculptures of Zimflamarp on top of important buildings.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never hurt hamsters.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.