Hapmotvol is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, unjust skunk.

Hapmotvol created a Higgs boson four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hapmotvol, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Hapmotvol, she will turn you into a goat.

Hapmotvol's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Hapmotvol's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about black holes.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never paint your legs magenta.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Always help pigs in need.