Figgubtarp is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, able dragonfly.

Figgubtarp created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Figgubtarp, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Figgubtarp, he will come to you in dreams.

Figgubtarp's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Figgubtarp's Holy Commandments

1. Figgubtarp must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never talk about black holes.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never look in ponds.