Tanbogxuck is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, stupid cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Tanbogxuck created light four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tanbogxuck, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tanbogxuck, it will torture you forever.

Tanbogxuck's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Tanbogxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tanbogxuck.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never wear cyan stockings.

5. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.