Sawlinwik Sakrowtif is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, sage hippopotamus.

Sawlinwik Sakrowtif created the Sunflower Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sawlinwik Sakrowtif, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sawlinwik Sakrowtif, he will jump up and down on your head.

Sawlinwik Sakrowtif's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Sawlinwik Sakrowtif's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Sawlinwik Sakrowtif.

2. Run away if six dogs approach from the south.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Hide from blue gulls for they are unholy.