Flatyogmis is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, humane swallow.

Flatyogmis created carbon four years ago.

If you believe in Flatyogmis, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Flatyogmis, he will think nothing of it.

Flatyogmis' most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Flatyogmis' Holy Commandments

1. Never write about black holes.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.