Farnbodkap is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, stupid pigeon.

Farnbodkap created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Farnbodkap, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Farnbodkap, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Farnbodkap's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Farnbodkap's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick goats.

2. Always make sure there are no manatees in a building before entering it.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not listen to music.