Parkarpzog is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, blissful bat.

Parkarpzog created an up quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Parkarpzog, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Parkarpzog, she will jump up and down on your head.

Parkarpzog's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Parkarpzog's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Erect six silicon sculptures of Parkarpzog on top of important buildings.

3. Erect a large silver sculpture of Parkarpzog on top of all buildings.

4. Hide if eight dogs approach from the east.

5. Never eat corn.