Cubjinbig is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, effective lobster.

Cubjinbig created a Higgs boson seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cubjinbig, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Cubjinbig, she will be very unhappy.

Cubjinbig's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Cubjinbig's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Cubjinbig.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Hide from blue whales for they are unholy.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Cubjinbig loves cats, so they must be honoured.