Nurzakmip is a god.

It takes the form of a large, capable crab.

Nurzakmip created parasitic wasps eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurzakmip, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Nurzakmip, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Nurzakmip's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Nurzakmip's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nurzakmip.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always help snakes in need.

4. Worship no other gods but Nurzakmip.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.