Volcenlarp is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, competent rhinoceros.

Volcenlarp created the planet Jupiter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Volcenlarp, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Volcenlarp, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Volcenlarp's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Volcenlarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.

5. Ducks are unholy and should not be approached.