Zogpigpak is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, contented centaur.

Zogpigpak created an up quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zogpigpak, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Zogpigpak, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Zogpigpak's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Zogpigpak's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about amino acids.

2. Do not shave your head.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. You must never eat bananas.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.