Bastflamfig is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, thoughtless dragon.

Bastflamfig created parasitic wasps two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastflamfig, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Bastflamfig, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Bastflamfig's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Bastflamfig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair white.

2. Do not bounce in public.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate goats.

4. Bastflamfig loves bats, so they must be honoured.

5. Never pour water over plants.