Hivcudkam is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, blissful squirrel.

Hivcudkam created bats two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hivcudkam, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Hivcudkam, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Hivcudkam's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Hivcudkam's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed tomatoes to whales while wearing violet stockings.

2. Do not wear lead on your body.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate grasshopers.

4. Never hurt horses.

5. Never play with disobedient children.