Nabyattzog is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, temperamental fairy.

Nabyattzog created matter six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nabyattzog, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Nabyattzog, it will come to you in dreams.

Nabyattzog's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Nabyattzog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never hurt pigs.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Respect your elders.