Mapcidjarn is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, merciful toad.

Mapcidjarn created a Higgs boson five billion years ago.

If you believe in Mapcidjarn, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Mapcidjarn, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Mapcidjarn's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Mapcidjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sheep in need.

2. Do not wear gray clothing.

3. Always help goats.

4. Mapcidjarn must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not chop down trees.