Kinsugflisappvadgesstetti is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, strong penguin.

Kinsugflisappvadgesstetti created everything that exists three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kinsugflisappvadgesstetti, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kinsugflisappvadgesstetti, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Kinsugflisappvadgesstetti's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Kinsugflisappvadgesstetti's Holy Commandments

1. Turtles are not to be trusted.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Put Kinsugflisappvadgesstetti first in all things.