Lakbassbass is a god.
He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, fast
mink.
Lakbassbass created the Milkyway seven billion years ago.
If you believe in
Lakbassbass, he will grant you three wishes.
If you do not believe in
Lakbassbass, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.
Lakbassbass' most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.
Lakbassbass' Holy Commandments1. Do not stand on grass.
2. Never eat onions.
3. Lakbassbass loves great tits, so they must be honoured.
4. Never think about planets.
5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.