Wipzaggiddog is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, clever aardvark.

Wipzaggiddog created a quark two years ago.

If you believe in Wipzaggiddog, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Wipzaggiddog, he will turn you into a slug.

Wipzaggiddog's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Wipzaggiddog's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if six porpoises approach from the south.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Feed all hungry goats.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.