Gepgovbig Tunflisbut Mapsasyak is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, unsympathetic frog.

Gepgovbig Tunflisbut Mapsasyak created the Sol system four billion years ago.

If you believe in Gepgovbig Tunflisbut Mapsasyak, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Gepgovbig Tunflisbut Mapsasyak, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Gepgovbig Tunflisbut Mapsasyak's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Gepgovbig Tunflisbut Mapsasyak's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Gepgovbig Tunflisbut Mapsasyak.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never laugh in holy places.

4. Always wear mauve.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.