Vondabbarn is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, ill-tempered capybara.

Vondabbarn created the universe eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vondabbarn, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Vondabbarn, he will turn you into a frog.

Vondabbarn's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Vondabbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Vondabbarn.

2. Always help manatees.

3. Never talk about gulls.

4. Do not dye your hair pink.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.