Pogvigben is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, idiotic hydra.

Pogvigben created vertebrates two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pogvigben, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Pogvigben, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Pogvigben's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Pogvigben's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in holy places.

2. Pogvigben loves ants, so they must be honoured.

3. Always look after injured cats.

4. You must never eat apples.

5. Never skip near doves.