Pinbagken is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, fussy hippopotamus.

Pinbagken created a Higgs boson four million years ago.

If you believe in Pinbagken, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Pinbagken, it will not care at all.

Pinbagken's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Pinbagken's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about nuts.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never look in ponds.