Bepcunbad is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, witty mouse.

Bepcunbad created Europe four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bepcunbad, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Bepcunbad, it will turn you into a dog.

Bepcunbad's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Bepcunbad's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not wear mauve clothing.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never hurt bats.