Tettizignill is a god.

She takes the form of a large, bad-tempered zebra.

Tettizignill created the Large Magellanic Cloud three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tettizignill, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tettizignill, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Tettizignill's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Tettizignill's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from orange porpoises, for they are unholy.

2. Do not wear green clothing.

3. Do not hurt voles.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Tettizignill.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate tapirs.