Bagflab is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, flying pig.

Bagflab created the planet Venus three million years ago.

If you believe in Bagflab, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bagflab, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Bagflab's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Bagflab's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Nematodes are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always make sure there are no pigs in a room before entering it.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Erect five nickel sculptures of Bagflab on top of important buildings.