Bopyokcin Jipvenbin Komjenhig is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, amazing finch.

Bopyokcin Jipvenbin Komjenhig created life two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bopyokcin Jipvenbin Komjenhig, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Bopyokcin Jipvenbin Komjenhig, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Bopyokcin Jipvenbin Komjenhig's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Bopyokcin Jipvenbin Komjenhig's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never think about planets.

3. Erect a large copper sculpture of Bopyokcin Jipvenbin Komjenhig on top of all buildings.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not wear titanium on your body.