Fidrullwiknadlim is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, humorless jackal.

Fidrullwiknadlim created gold seven million years ago.

If you believe in Fidrullwiknadlim, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Fidrullwiknadlim, it will turn you into a mouse.

Fidrullwiknadlim's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Fidrullwiknadlim's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fidrullwiknadlim.

5. Do not hurt sharks.