Tettipomwap is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, omnipotent fairy.

Tettipomwap created the Sol system eight million years ago.

If you believe in Tettipomwap, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tettipomwap, she will turn you into a puffin.

Tettipomwap's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Tettipomwap's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about galaxies.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.