Pibtomwod is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, annoying naga.

Pibtomwod created dark matter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pibtomwod, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Pibtomwod, he will turn you into a slug.

Pibtomwod's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Pibtomwod's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Hide from violet aardvarks for they are unholy.

3. Never write about black holes.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not listen to music.