Nurlbopquag is a god.

He takes the form of a small, competent tapir.

Nurlbopquag created the universe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Nurlbopquag, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nurlbopquag, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Nurlbopquag's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Nurlbopquag's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about nebulae.

2. Never look at black holes.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never talk about nematodes.

5. Always treat aardvarks with great respect.