Loophabbin is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, fast crocodile.

Loophabbin created time and space five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Loophabbin, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Loophabbin, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Loophabbin's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Loophabbin's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if eight sheep approach from the south.

2. You must never eat cherries.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not wear green clothing.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.