Jinnartmig is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, humorless wren.

Jinnartmig created the world five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jinnartmig, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Jinnartmig, it will turn you into a rat.

Jinnartmig's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Jinnartmig's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a building before entering it.

3. Run away if nine moths approach from the north.

4. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Do not drink water in orange rooms.