Sitbus is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, self-confident goat.

Sitbus created the world five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitbus, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Sitbus, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Sitbus' most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Sitbus' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Do not wear lead on your body.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Always look after injured eagles.