Manflanmil Bagtarpnur is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, temperamental skunk.

Manflanmil Bagtarpnur created a top quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Manflanmil Bagtarpnur, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Manflanmil Bagtarpnur, she will turn you into a puffin.

Manflanmil Bagtarpnur's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Manflanmil Bagtarpnur's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt ants.

2. Worship no other gods but Manflanmil Bagtarpnur.

3. Always treat turtles with great respect.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Always obey Manflanmil Bagtarpnur's priests.