Yatgedgep is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, proud lobster.

Yatgedgep created water two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yatgedgep, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yatgedgep, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Yatgedgep's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Yatgedgep's Holy Commandments

1. Never run near tortoises.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never go into indigo rooms.

4. Retreat if eight capybaras approach from the east.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Yatgedgep.