Mitfatbapvingomcar is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, prudent crab.

Mitfatbapvingomcar created Mount Everest nine million years ago.

If you believe in Mitfatbapvingomcar, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Mitfatbapvingomcar, he will not care at all.

Mitfatbapvingomcar's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Mitfatbapvingomcar's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick goats.

2. Never wear green trousers.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Hide if seven grasshopers approach from the west.

5. Cats are not to be trusted.