Zogsakbot is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, vain hamster.

Zogsakbot created matter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zogsakbot, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Zogsakbot, she will send minions to preach to you.

Zogsakbot's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Zogsakbot's Holy Commandments

1. Put Zogsakbot first in all things.

2. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. You must pray to Zogsakbot three times a day.

5. Do not dye your hair blue.