Veendamfen is a god.
She takes the form of an extremely fat, omnipotent
gorilla.
Veendamfen created the planet Saturn four billion years ago.
If you believe in
Veendamfen, she will give you a free moon.
If you do not believe in
Veendamfen, she will turn you into a blue tit.
Veendamfen's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.
Veendamfen's Holy Commandments1. Always make sure there are no badgers in a room before entering it.
2. Worship no other gods but Veendamfen.
3. Do not kill goats.
4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.
5. Look mercifully on unfortunate whales.