Xemrotzakgarhogzog is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, quiet warg.

Xemrotzakgarhogzog created gold five million years ago.

If you believe in Xemrotzakgarhogzog, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Xemrotzakgarhogzog, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Xemrotzakgarhogzog's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Xemrotzakgarhogzog's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Mites are not to be trusted.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never talk about cell theory.