Bonkzanstipgennulcarvog Kikjippad is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, slow human.

Bonkzanstipgennulcarvog Kikjippad created parasitic wasps six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bonkzanstipgennulcarvog Kikjippad, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bonkzanstipgennulcarvog Kikjippad, it will laugh at you.

Bonkzanstipgennulcarvog Kikjippad's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Bonkzanstipgennulcarvog Kikjippad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Do not drink alcohol.