Sasbotmon is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, strong human.

Sasbotmon created a top quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sasbotmon, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Sasbotmon, she will turn you into a puffin.

Sasbotmon's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Sasbotmon's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat doves with great respect.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Never paint your feet black.

4. Always help squirrels in need.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.