Wipranpark is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, bad-tempered eagle.

Wipranpark created Europe five billion years ago.

If you believe in Wipranpark, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Wipranpark, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Wipranpark's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Wipranpark's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Wipranpark.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Always treat turtles with great respect.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not wear copper on your body.