Zantagfet is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, able dugong.

Zantagfet created a quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zantagfet, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Zantagfet, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Zantagfet's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Zantagfet's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Always help sick sharks.

3. Always obey Zantagfet's priests.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not speak about onions.