Nartbodmum is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, compassionate wyrm.

Nartbodmum created humankind three billion years ago.

If you believe in Nartbodmum, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Nartbodmum, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Nartbodmum's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Nartbodmum's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Nartbodmum.

3. Hide if three porpoises approach from the south.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.