Godvigvab is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, vain giraffe.

Godvigvab created everything that exists six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Godvigvab, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Godvigvab, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Godvigvab's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Godvigvab's Holy Commandments

1. Put Godvigvab first in all things.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never talk about pigs.