Xemsanddub is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, capable naga.

Xemsanddub created gold seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xemsanddub, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Xemsanddub, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Xemsanddub's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Xemsanddub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not jump in public.

2. Do not hurt capybaras.

3. Do not speak about pineapples.

4. Do not wear silicon on your body.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.